Ceirra Hargan’s Journey of Healing and Sobriety

Sponsored by Courage 365

In this episode of Conversations with Rich Bennett, Ceirra Hargan shares her powerful journey from battling addiction to heroin and fentanyl to achieving sobriety and becoming a spiritual empowerment coach. Ceirra opens up about her childhood struggles, the pivotal moments leading to her recovery, and the spiritual awakening that transformed her life. She now dedicates her work to helping others heal from trauma and addiction. Sponsored by Courage 365, an organization that empowers survivors of abuse, this episode is a testament to resilience and hope.

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Sponsor Message:

This episode is sponsored by Courage 365, an organization committed to empowering survivors of abuse. Whether you're on a healing journey or supporting someone who is, Courage 365 offers resources, community, and education to help survivors reclaim their lives and thrive. With tools, events, and a safe space for recovery, they are here to support you every step of the way. Visit Courage365.org to take your first courageous step towards healing and living your most empowered life.

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Transcript

Rich Bennett 0:00
Thanks for joining the conversation where we explore the stories and experiences that shape our world. I'm your host, Rich Bennett. Today, I'm joined by Cierra Hagen, someone who has not only overcome immense challenges, but has turned her life around in an inspiring way. Cierra struggled with addiction from a young age, beginning with food and eventually battling heroin and fentanyl addiction for eight years. After achieving sobriety, Cierra experienced a profound spiritual awakening, leading her to become a spiritual empowerment coach. She now dedicates her life to helping others heal from childhood trauma, shift limiting beliefs and embrace their true potential. This I am really looking forward to this because those of you listening, you know how much I love to hear the stories of people that are in recovery 

and yes, I do have the Kleenex next to me just in case, because as you all know, yes, I have been known to cry. When you hear the stories, you can't help it Show how you don't share. 

Ceirra Hargan 1:13
Yeah, that was a bit. Introduction. Thank you. 

Rich Bennett 1:15
Thank 

Ceirra Hargan 1:16
So 

Rich Bennett 1:16
you. 

Ceirra Hargan 1:16
I'm excited to be. 

Rich Bennett 1:17
Thank you. So I want to start let's just start from the beginning because you say your first your first addiction was food at a young age, right? 

Ceirra Hargan 1:27
Yeah. So my food addiction is definitely very tied in to all my other addictions. So from a very early age, probably from the age of like five, I was never taught how to stop eating. And so I always watched my parents like overeat and Benji, you know, I was like that little kid ordering the full adult meal when we 

Rich Bennett 1:51
Right. 

Ceirra Hargan 1:51
went to Mexican restaurants. And I was a very obese child. And so I also just had no idea how to feel. My emotions, my emotions just always felt like so confusing to me. So I feel like I was trained from a very young age to go outside of myself, to try and make myself feel better and to try and push my emotions down, especially with food. And then as I got into as soon as I got into my teenage years, I just kind of spiraled. I started smoking weed, drinking alcohol with my friends. And then by the time I was 21, it continued to heroin off and all and meth. 

Rich Bennett 2:35
Oh, okay. You said five years old. 

Ceirra Hargan 2:40
Yeah, probably just from the time I was born. It was just the conditioning of my parents. And my parents did the best that they 

Rich Bennett 2:48
Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 2:48
knew how to just they were doing the best with what they were taught. And so I had no idea how to eat food when I was younger. 

Rich Bennett 2:58
How is that doing? I mean, growing up with friends, especially at five, you said you were bigger in all this food. How tough was that? 

Ceirra Hargan 3:06
Oh, yeah. All my friends came to my house because we had the best snacks and. 

Rich Bennett 3:13
I mean, the good thing is you you have friends because a lot of people, unfortunately, have a hard time making friends when they're going through that 

Ceirra Hargan 3:22
I am. I'm very grateful for, like, how obese I was. I actually did always have friends and I 

Rich Bennett 3:31
good. 

Ceirra Hargan 3:32
was never really bullied. I feel like bullying wasn't really something that I was here to experience, thankfully. 

Rich Bennett 3:39
Right. Good. That's good, then. So. And you said when you were teenagers, when you started, you said drinking a weed. Or was it just weed? 

Ceirra Hargan 3:47
Yeah. I started drinking alcohol, smoking weed, smoking cigarettes. I also started. Things like self-harm because I just had no idea how to deal with my emotions. And of course 

Rich Bennett 4:01
Why? 

Ceirra Hargan 4:01
it's a really hard age too. So I just it I could never tell like which emotion I was feeling. So I remember I had never, until my recovery, I had never actually felt angry before. Like if something happened to me and I knew I should be angry, I would just start crying my eyes out because I didn't know what I was feeling. And so I think self-harm to me was just like, at least if I feel pain, I know it's pain. 

Rich Bennett 4:31
Right. Are you, by chance an only child? 

Ceirra Hargan 4:35
No, I'm the middle. 

Rich Bennett 4:36
No, really? Out of how many of you don't mind me asking? 

Ceirra Hargan 4:41
Three. So I have a younger. 

Rich Bennett 4:42
Okay. 

Ceirra Hargan 4:43
And an older sister. 

Rich Bennett 4:45
Now, did they go through the same problems as well? 

Ceirra Hargan 4:47
No. We are all so different. 

Rich Bennett 4:51
Really? 

Ceirra Hargan 4:51
We are all. We are all so different from each other. It's actually really interesting. 

Rich Bennett 4:58
Wow. Okay, so you're a teenager now. You're doing weed, You're doing drinkin. When did that lead to heroin? 

Ceirra Hargan 5:10
I started going to a lot of raves and things like that. 

Rich Bennett 5:15
So you're probably talking about this can't be right because the Rays are big in the nineties, right? 

Ceirra Hargan 5:22
They came back pretty strong, especially in Colorado. Oh, probably 

Rich Bennett 5:27
Okay. 

Ceirra Hargan 5:27
around like 2010. 

Rich Bennett 5:30
Okay. 

Ceirra Hargan 5:30
Around that time, like 2010 to 2016, raves were really big in Colorado. Like, I don't know how big they are now, but when I was in high school, I was going to a rave probably once a week sometimes. 

Rich Bennett 5:44
Wow. Okay. I just wanted to clarify that, because those of you listening, which she said raised my first all it is the nineties and it's a very no way. Doing raves in the nineties because that was I got to do the math here 30 years ago. 

Ceirra Hargan 6:03
I was born in 93. 

Rich Bennett 6:05
Really? 

Ceirra Hargan 6:06
Yeah. 

Rich Bennett 6:07
Okay, So is my son. 

All right, So. All right, So that's when you started doing heroin. What was it that actually led you to the heroin? 

Ceirra Hargan 6:18
So when I was 21, I actually had the longest period of sobriety, which was probably about 4 to 6 weeks or not 4 to 6 weeks, sorry, like probably 4 to 6 months. 

Rich Bennett 6:30
Okay. 

Ceirra Hargan 6:32
That was the longest period of sobriety I had had since I was like 14 years old. And in that amount of time, I started becoming really obsessive about fitness and working out. And I had just replaced one addiction with another. 

Rich Bennett 6:48
Mm hmm. 

Ceirra Hargan 6:48
And so I'd hurt myself really bad because I was obsessing over it and I was also failing business school. So I just went to business school because that's what everybody else told me would do. Well, it's not 

Rich Bennett 7:04
Right. 

Ceirra Hargan 7:04
what I actually wanted to do. And it was really hard for me, like I was taking classes sometimes three times just to pass it. Just my mind, like, never really worked that way. I really liked business, but the math was really 

Rich Bennett 7:19
Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 7:19
hard to get through. And so at the same time that I failed business school, 

I actually did fail business school. I dropped out because I got accepted into a very nice business school and it terrified me. 

Rich Bennett 7:36
Okay. 

Ceirra Hargan 7:39
So I was dropping out of business school and then I hurt myself all at the same time. So I started like doing prescription drugs. I started drinking a lot again, and eventually I'd started doing heroin. 

Rich Bennett 7:54
Hmm. All right. I got I have to ask because you didn't want to do business. What was it that you actually wanted to do? 

Ceirra Hargan 8:02
During my addiction, I actually went back to school for Human Services, and I'm about like a year away from that degree. And I'm actually going to start working in recovery hopefully in the next couple of months. 

Rich Bennett 8:14
Really? Sure. Like in the public health sector. 

Ceirra Hargan 8:18
Yeah, that's what I've always I've always, since an early age, like I've just felt like I've wanted to help people with addiction. 

Rich Bennett 8:26
Thank you for that. That's I know the first time I learned about what a peer recovery specialist was. Was it the health department? We were doing podcasts and he had four of them on there. I had no idea what a peer recovery specialist was. This is this is my introduction to recovery and when I heard the stories of the four peer recovery specialists we had and everything they went through, because they're in recovery themselves and everybody I've met so far that is doing this especially, it's just 

it's amazing to me because who better to help somebody that's in recovery than somebody that's in recovery themselves? 

Ceirra Hargan 9:16
Exactly. I went through so many methadone programs 

Rich Bennett 9:20
Mm hmm. 

Ceirra Hargan 9:20
with that. People just they just did not understand like I was using with my boyfriend. And I remember I had one girl in particular where she just, like, tried to blame it all on him. And I understand. 

Rich Bennett 9:33
Wow. 

Ceirra Hargan 9:35
And I just sat there and I was like I was like, I take full blame for or I take full responsibility for my actions. Like, if anything, he probably, like, protected me. Like, yes, we were using together, but he probably protected me as a woman in that kind of addiction. 

Rich Bennett 9:52
Yeah, 

Ceirra Hargan 9:52
And just it being as an outsider of people haven't like, gone through these things themselves. So you don't connect as deeply. And then I'm like going in methadone programs and being addicted to retinol. I had never actually met somebody. I know they exist, but I had never actually met somebody face to face that had and completed a methadone program or 

Rich Bennett 10:15
right. 

Ceirra Hargan 10:15
had actually stayed in recovery after fentanyl. And so I think that's why I so badly wanted to help people is because I was like, if I could be that one person that is like, hey, this is how I did it, and you can do it, too. 

Rich Bennett 10:30
Yeah. And the thing is, correct me if I'm wrong, but at least I know this is the way it is here. From what I've heard, the fentanyl is scary. But. And they were what it was that they were lacing heroin, fentanyl. Now people are just getting street fentanyl. And now I understand they're mixing the fentanyl with psilocybin. 

Which psilocybin is nasty as hell. I don't know if you've seen anybody that has been affected by that yet or not, and hopefully you never will if you have it. But I just a lot of people and maybe you can explain to still listeners because a lot of people don't understand if somebody has told you something that, let's say heroin, fentanyl, why they go back to it. And now even with the silencing, why they go back to it, can you explain there by listening what makes somebody that's an addiction, go back and look for, I guess, stronger doses or whatever. 

Ceirra Hargan 11:41
Yeah, absolutely. So 

from my experience personally, first of all, so I you grow up like no one. No one tells themselves like, oh, I'm going to be a heroin addict when I get older. 

Rich Bennett 11:55
Right. 

Ceirra Hargan 11:57
There's small things that happen every day that spirals it and polarizes it to the opposite spectrum. So like, of course, I was like, Oh, I'll never do heroin. So then I did heroin and I could always get myself clean and sober if I had to. So like, 

Rich Bennett 12:18
Right. 

Ceirra Hargan 12:19
if I was doing too much cocaine, I would stop and be like, take a couple weeks off. And I felt like I had control over it. It wasn't. I think I went into that same mentality with heroin, not realizing like the physical addiction of it. And by the time I had realized how physical the withdrawal is, I was already in it. 

Rich Bennett 12:42
Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 12:42
And I think once you get to that point where it's completely taken over your survival and when you're in fight or flight, all of the time and your mind is convincing you that you're going to die without it, then of course you're willing to find whatever is going to suppress that feeling. 

Rich Bennett 13:03
Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 13:03
And this is where this is Why you need peer recovery coaches is because if you haven't been in that situation, it's hard for somebody looking out into it, looking out and being the observer to it and being like, Why don't you just stop? I don't understand because they'll never know what it's like to wake up that morning and it be the first thing that you need to just function as a person. I just needed it to function. And if I couldn't function, I couldn't go to work. And with heroin, I was actually a functioning addict. Like I had a job. I was able to maintain work. And it wasn't actually until I started doing fentanyl, where heroin at least gave me like a timeframe where 

Rich Bennett 13:53
hmm. 

Ceirra Hargan 13:53
I wouldn't go into withdrawal for like, it depends on where I was, but like maybe 12 hours later. But with fentanyl I would use and I would be in full withdrawal 8 hours later. So you truly you can't function on fentanyl because it's so strong and 

Rich Bennett 14:11
Right. 

Ceirra Hargan 14:11
it's so expensive. And it just happens. It truly you just wake up one day and you're like, This is where I'm at. 

Rich Bennett 14:21
Yeah. Wow. 

Ceirra Hargan 14:22
You just open your eyes one day and you kind of like come to you've been living so unconsciously in such a state of survival that when you finally come to neck, what have I been doing? And then you don't even know how to get out of it because 

Rich Bennett 14:38
Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 14:38
it's been so long. 

Rich Bennett 14:41
And the thing is, with a lot of people don't. I mean, addiction is a disease, let's face it. Yeah. It starts as a choice because you do it. Every addiction does. Whether it's smoking, whether it's drink it, whether it's gambling, whether sex, whatever. The thing I tell these people when they say, oh, not at the addict made a choice, they can quit. And a lot of these people smoke and everything where you ask them to get rid of their cigarettes. Oh, no, they can't do it. Why? Because you need that. That's what you grab for. So would you just explain? It's basically the same thing with cigarettes. It's I guess people crave for it in the morning. They need it. They need it throughout the day. But now you're in recovery and you found something better. Definitely better. But before we get in there, I want to ask where when did you finally decide to seek recovery? 

Ceirra Hargan 15:43
So just adding to that really fast as so, we absolutely have become a nation of addicts. 

Rich Bennett 15:50
Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 15:50
So an addiction is just anything that you keep doing, even though you know it's not good for you. And so sitting on tick tock all day long is everyone is addicted to it. 

Rich Bennett 16:03
That's true. 

Ceirra Hargan 16:04
How many things are you putting off in your life or how many like how many belief systems are being affirmed every single time you go to tick tock. 

Rich Bennett 16:14
Mm. 

Ceirra Hargan 16:15
And so when I finally decided to. My body actually, like, started shutting down on me. So with those drugs like that. 

Rich Bennett 16:25
Hola. You say your your body or your body. 

Ceirra Hargan 16:28
My body. 

Rich Bennett 16:31
I just want to clarify that. I like what? 

Ceirra Hargan 16:35
Yeah. So daring that when it got to its worst, I got a back infection and it actually, I did not want to go to the hospital. So I laid in bed and just used as long as I possibly could and like my legs were swelling and I couldn't walk and I was better because I knew that they were going to start making me use. I went to the hospital and they told me that the infection was like so close to my spine that if I'd waited any longer, it could have been fatal. 

Rich Bennett 17:09
God. 

Ceirra Hargan 17:10
Yeah. And then so I was in the hospital for two weeks. This was during COVID, so like, nobody could come visit me or anything. And then I went into rehab. I was in rehab for 30 days. Why? The infection still cleared? And then I left rehab and I went right back to using because I wasn't ready to quit yet. So I kind of use COVID as an excuse to leave rehab to so that I could continue to use and then I continued to use for about a year after that. And then I kind of just started getting like these feelings of like, it's time. It's time like my mental cognition was so bad that I couldn't even speak. Like if I was trying to have a conversation with you, somebody would ask me a question and I would say half the sentence, and then I would just forget what I. 

Rich Bennett 18:06
Early. 

Ceirra Hargan 18:07
I've I have a completely healed my nervous system. Like I can sit here and have this conversation with you. But it was so slow and I was like, I was talking like this. 

Rich Bennett 18:19
Wow. 

Ceirra Hargan 18:21
And it terrified me. Like when it got that bad, I started to get really scared because I was like, Whoa, what if I can't repair this? 

Rich Bennett 18:29
Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 18:31
And like, every day I sit in so much gratitude that I was able to repair it. And so I started getting these feelings like, you can't continue like this. Like you've already been in the hospital, you've already been in rehab. You you're you can't even think anymore. 

And so me and my boyfriend, we had the opportunity to visit New York City during the pandemic, and it was a lot cheaper to be able to go see the city. 

Rich Bennett 19:03
Right. 

Ceirra Hargan 19:03
We went on vacation and I just for like a couple of weeks, we loved it. We decided that we were going to try to move there. And looking back on it now, it had to of terrified my parents 

because we hadn't been sober in the last eight years. 

Rich Bennett 19:21
Oh, wow. 

Ceirra Hargan 19:22
We were either going to, like, move to New York City and get sober or end up on the streets of New York City. 

Rich Bennett 19:30
Well, okay. Okay. So your boyfriend's was in addiction as well. 

Ceirra Hargan 19:35
Yeah. So he has been through this with me the entire time, and we're still together today. 

Rich Bennett 19:40
That is all. You are the second person I've had on who then? Boyfriend and girlfriend. That's how they started out. Now, the other couple's now married, but it's just going through. They were going through addiction together and now recovery together. 

Ceirra Hargan 20:01
I'm so happy because, like, you never hear that. Like, you never hear that they were able to make it through together and change their life together. So I love. 

Rich Bennett 20:10
Oh, they had there. And he was. If I'm not mistaken, he was her dealer. 

Oh yeah. And wonderful couple. And to see them raising their son and everything they're doing and it's just it, it gives, it gives you hope because, you know, if a couple that has gone through addiction together can do recovery together than anybody can. So. Yeah. Yeah. What do you if you guys haven't gotten married yet? I think wedding bells are on the horizon there. 

Okay, so you move. You both move to New York City, and that's. That's when the recovery started, right? 

Ceirra Hargan 20:55
Yes. Yes. So we kind of like took this a leap of faith. Like, I started to feel like I started to feel like I had to 

Rich Bennett 21:05
Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 21:06
just because of the things that were happening. And I was just tired. Like I was like, I think I'm finally done. And when we moved to New York, me and my boyfriend were both able to stabilize on methadone for the first time ever. So I've been in and out of so many different methadone programs, and this was the first time where we were able to stabilize ourselves. And start to make those changes in our life. So we are both able to get like pretty decent jobs while we were starting to taper ourselves off of methadone and we just had to completely change our lives. But I just it, it really showed me that when you're ready to make change in your life and when you're ready to get sober, the world really does open up to you. Like the universe wants you to be healthy and sober. And so just this perfect pathway opened up for us to take that opportunity. 

Rich Bennett 22:08
How long have you been in recovery now? 

Ceirra Hargan 22:10
I've been sober from heroin and fentanyl for three and a half years, and I've been sober from methadone for two and a half years. 

Rich Bennett 22:18
That is awesome. That's great. And your boyfriend the same. 

Ceirra Hargan 22:22
Yes. 

Rich Bennett 22:23
Oh, that is great. 

Ceirra Hargan 22:24
He's a little bit after me. So, like, I have like four months of sobriety on him. But yeah. 

Rich Bennett 22:30
Yeah, but you together, I mean, yeah, we talked about the peer recovery specialist. Here it is. You guys are supporting each other. Now, does he want to do the same thing? Is you when you talked about becoming like a peer recovery specialist. 

Ceirra Hargan 22:45
He is actually working for the city of New York. So. 

Rich Bennett 22:50
Really? 

Ceirra Hargan 22:50
Yeah. So he has a really good job. 

Rich Bennett 22:56
Wow. That is wholly 

Ceirra Hargan 22:58
Again. Like when you are ready, doors open up for you. And like, there is definitely, like a bigger plan in place for both of us. Like, he started once. He was like, comfortable in his recovery. He started actually working at immigrant shelters in New York City and not just like burst his heart wide open, like 

Rich Bennett 23:21
right. 

Ceirra Hargan 23:21
working with those people cause my boyfriend's Mexican in. 

Rich Bennett 23:24
Okay. 

Ceirra Hargan 23:26
So and he was like making friends with all of them, of like, who really saw what was happening on a very personal and deep intellectual level. And then after that, since he had that experience, like working with immigrants, he got a job actually working for the city. 

Rich Bennett 23:41
Wow. All right. Now, does he go on podcast as well? 

Ceirra Hargan 23:45
No. 

Rich Bennett 23:46
No. 

Oh, I had a great idea for you to. I don't think there's anybody else. He'd need to talk him into doing this. Or maybe not going on other podcasts. But I think if the two of you start your own podcast, like the recovery couple. 

Ceirra Hargan 24:08
Yeah. 

Rich Bennett 24:08
I, I don't know of any other podcast where it's a couple that's in recovery doing it. 

Ceirra Hargan 24:13
I'll have an listen to this replay. 

Rich Bennett 24:18
I think it would be great. You'd be helping a lot, a lot of people. Then if you haven't done this yet, or if you're not in the process of doing it, you should. Have you thought about writing a book? 

Ceirra Hargan 24:29
I've thought about it. I don't know if writing is my thing. 

So I have I do share my story a lot. Like, I'm on a lot of podcasts. I do a lot of video content, so I do have a YouTube channel. 

Rich Bennett 24:42
Okay. 

Ceirra Hargan 24:43
I just. I have not written anything yet. 

Rich Bennett 24:48
Okay, sir. I don't know if you know this or not. Do you ever use Microsoft Word? 

Ceirra Hargan 24:54
Yes. 

Rich Bennett 24:55
Yeah, It's got this little thing up there. It says dictate. So you can talk to it and you don't have to type anything out. The other thing is to with all these case you've been on. If they're doing it right, there will be a transcript. So you can always copy and paste and edit. However, I'm just saying. 

Ceirra Hargan 25:18
Yeah, that's a great idea. 

Rich Bennett 25:19
The writing part could be easy for you. You have an awesome story to share. So yeah, I. I think you should definitely share it. So now you're in recovery, but what is it that you're actually doing now? 

Ceirra Hargan 25:34
So when I stabilized myself on methadone, I really started like meditating and working on myself while I was tapering myself off of methadone. Have you ever heard of Jodie Spencer? 

Rich Bennett 25:52
No. 

Ceirra Hargan 25:53
So Joe dispenser, he's incredible. He you would actually like him if you like to like, meditate and stuff, 

Rich Bennett 26:01
Okay. 

Ceirra Hargan 26:01
but really cool it. Actually explaining to you scientifically what you're doing in meditation and just 

Rich Bennett 26:08
Oh. 

Ceirra Hargan 26:08
how to, like, create long lasting change in your life. So I kind of dug deep into Joe to spend his work where I was meditating for. 2 hours a day. Big. 

Rich Bennett 26:21
Why? 

Ceirra Hargan 26:22
Yeah, I like. I went all in. I knew something had to change. I knew the person that I was. I needed to change and 

Rich Bennett 26:30
Wait 

Ceirra Hargan 26:30
I. 

Rich Bennett 26:31
a minute. Just. Just to be clear. Not 2 hours continuous. 

Ceirra Hargan 26:36
No. So once in the morning. One. 

Rich Bennett 26:38
Okay. All right. All right. I just wanted to I just wanted to clarify that because people listening could be like she would sit there for 2 hours and just. 

Ceirra Hargan 26:48
Well, that's what it took, right? Because 

Rich Bennett 26:50
Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 26:50
if I was in addiction for my entire life, I had let my body run the show my entire life. I was living unconsciously my entire life. So I had to train the wild beast. And I did that. Why? I was tapering off of methadone. And so I was tapering off of methadone. I was in a withdrawal for like eight months where I would just shake all the time. I didn't know if I was hot or cold. I didn't know if I would be emotional that day. And I still had to, like, do things like go to work. But thankfully, Joe Dispenser gave me the tools I needed to get through the day. So the more I was meditating, the less my triggers would be. I would feel a lot more calm and it also just gave me the space to cry my eyes out because I'd never felt my emotions before. And I needed that one hour in the morning to cry my eyes out, to release what needed to be released just so I could go to work. 

Know. 

Rich Bennett 27:56
I'm sorry. Go ahead. 

Ceirra Hargan 27:57
And it was terrifying like especially. 

Rich Bennett 27:59
Well, if you've never done it before. Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 28:02
Exactly. It was terrifying because I'd never felt my emotions before. Like I didn't even know what sober Sierra would look like. 

Rich Bennett 28:11
Right. 

Ceirra Hargan 28:11
And so as I was tapering myself off more and more, it was like I would be more terrified. But I really pushed it through that fear. And I was like, No, we're making a change here. And I know life can't continue like this. And I also I knew that this opportunity to move to New York City was like once in a lifetime. And it was given to me for a reason. 

Rich Bennett 28:37
Mm hmm. So how did you find out about him? 

Ceirra Hargan 28:42
Joe dispenser. 

Rich Bennett 28:43
Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 28:43
So when I was 21, he was he kind of travels all around the world and now hosting these live events. And he helps people heal from addictions and chronic illness. And he has people like truly seeing miracles in their life from chronic illness, like he has people standing out of wheelchairs, that he's the events healing terminal cancer all through meditation and changing like belief systems about yourself. 

Rich Bennett 29:14
Wow. Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 29:14
What? 

Rich Bennett 29:15
I got to talk to him. 

Ceirra Hargan 29:17
He's incredible. So when when I was 21, when I had that really short span of sobriety, I actually went to one of his like two day workshops before he really blew up. And he was just teaching you how to meditate. Like he was just starting to share his work. And so meditation was introduced it to me before I went into the worst part of my addiction. And then when I moved to New York, I started having these thoughts of like, Who was that guy? Like, who was that guy who I went and saw live when I was like 21. He taught me how to meditate. He sounded good. 

And one night, like his name just popped up into my head, a Joe dispenser. And from that moment, like, I started just with his 15 minute meditations every day. Like I said, my triggers started getting better and better. I started watching all of his interviews, all of his testimonials of all these people changing their lives. And I just went all in to change. I had to change the person that I was completely. 

Rich Bennett 30:28
And now you're coaching people. 

Ceirra Hargan 30:30
Yeah. So when I decided to get off of methadone, I actually had a very spiritual experience. So. 

Rich Bennett 30:39
You know, you have to explain. 

Ceirra Hargan 30:42
Yes. 

So it was four days of sobriety and I was doing breath work just to get through the withdrawal. I had tapered myself all the way down from like five milligrams of methadone, but it was so bad. Still, I still went to full withdrawal and so four days of sobriety, I'm doing breath work laying on my floor just so I can get some sleep because I hadn't slept in four days and I just I started laughing and crying on the floor like something happened inside of me where I just felt like I went inside this complete state of bliss. I felt so connected to, like, everyone and everything. Like, it just. It felt like I was one with everything. 

Rich Bennett 31:31
Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 31:32
And it was that moment for me where it was like, Whoa! Like, is this what life is like? Is is this possible? 

Rich Bennett 31:40
Why? 

Ceirra Hargan 31:41
Because my entire life, like my entire life, I went outside of myself with everything I did to make myself feel better. And that was the moment where I was like, You made it. It's okay. Like, it's all been worth it. Knew this entire time, and I never had, like, any kind of spiritual experiences. Like, my entire life. It was me and my addiction. 

Rich Bennett 32:09
Right. 

Ceirra Hargan 32:09
I never like. I was never religious. I was actually very atheist. And that moment for me, it opened up everything. It was almost like my gift of sobriety. Yeah. 

Rich Bennett 32:22
Wow, That's amazing. So what? Why did you decide? Well, I think I know why, but tell everybody why you decided to actually start doing this and make it a business. You're probably happy you did that. Business management now, aren't you? 

Ceirra Hargan 32:40
Yeah, exactly. Like all those accounting classes I. I'm like, This makes sense. 

The universe is always taking care of you, even in your hardest times. It's all happening for a reason. So all those business classes I had to take three times. They come in. They definitely come in handy now. 

Rich Bennett 33:04
What's the name of the actual business? 

Ceirra Hargan 33:07
The actual business is a wake and heart quantum healing. 

Rich Bennett 33:10
Awakened heart. Quantum healing, Awakened heart, quantum heal. All right. Because I know somebody is going to ask, what is quantum healing? So explain that. 

Ceirra Hargan 33:23
Yeah. So quantum healing. So it's called A, B, q h. So it's kind of what we were talking about before this, where it's a light hypnosis, it stands for Beyond Quantum Healing, where we really put you into a meditative state so that you can put the analytical mind to the side so that we can get to the root of your emotions. We can get root to your we can get to the root of your childhood trauma and the things that we're storing inside of the body because we store our traumas inside of our body and they're limiting us and they're causing chronic illness in our body. And so we can release these things. It just it completely opens us up and it allows us to feel more love and it allows us to gain the higher perspective on why we went through these things. And then also when we connect in this way after we release our traumas, then it allows you to connect to what is called the higher self. So when you get the analytical mind to the side, we all have a greater consciousness that we can connect to called the higher self. And the higher self is here to guide us and to love us. And so you can bring any questions to your session about your life. Like why did these traumas happen to me? Why did this addiction happen to me? If you have questions on like relationships or you're having trouble forgiving people, you can ask all of those questions to your higher self to gain the higher perspective so that you can move on from it. 

Rich Bennett 35:03
So how many? And I don't want to ask you, how many times since you started doing this, how successful has it been so far? Because you've only been doing it, what, for two years? Three years? 

Ceirra Hargan 35:18
It's probably been about two. 

Rich Bennett 35:19
Two years. 

Ceirra Hargan 35:20
Yeah, it's actually always been pretty successful. I just 

Rich Bennett 35:24
Good. 

Ceirra Hargan 35:24
feel like it's sort of something that I'm meant to do. 

Rich Bennett 35:27
Mm hmm. 

Ceirra Hargan 35:28
I am also becoming a peer recovery advocate. 

Rich Bennett 35:33
Yes. 

Ceirra Hargan 35:34
Yeah, 

but yeah, it's always done really well and it just continues to grow. And then I also do a lot of coaching, so I give people all of the tools that I used it to help me so that I could become a new person. And I'm just so passionate about it because it's like this life is so much more beautiful and so much more magical than I ever could have imagined it to be. And so I also understand what it's like to be stuck in that addiction. 

Rich Bennett 36:05
Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 36:05
And I just want people to see that it's okay to face their trauma. And then once you actually feel your trauma and you feel your emotions, like, oh, that actually wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. 

Rich Bennett 36:20
All right. So I love hearing these things 

with the clients you've had so far. Can you share a feel good story? 

Ceirra Hargan 36:34
One of the ones that I'd love to share that like gets me emotional is there's this woman and she she was the one of the hardest workers I've ever met, But she was in such a state of fight or flight just from her own anxieties that her body started to completely shut down on her. And it's so bad that the doctor thought that it was EMS, but any kind of like tests and things that they did, it was coming back negative so they could not figure out what was wrong with her. And it was truly just her body in this extreme state of fire flight. Her body had just completely disconnected and it just felt like it was like ripping for control. And so if she went into, she would do different things that would like kind of make her feel better. But if she went to the grocery store and she, like, got nervous or something happened, her legs would shut down on her right there. 

Rich Bennett 37:37
What? 

Ceirra Hargan 37:37
Yeah. So she would she started, like using a wheelchair. She felt like she couldn't walk anymore. And she just started she kind of couldn't confine herself to her home. 

Rich Bennett 37:50
She's given up. 

Ceirra Hargan 37:51
Yeah. She just confined confined herself to her home because she's like, if I go to the grocery store and I can't walk out of that grocery store, and I drove myself, her life was, like, completely taken from her. Like her and her husband have no marriage anymore because they couldn't have fun together anymore. And she was just such a sweet lady. And so she came to me and she was like, I'm starting to, like, meditate and do these things. I feel like I am starting to open a more spiritually. I would love to do a session with you. So during her session, I had her really connecting with her body and just send her lots. So I had her send her body So much love because we are. We live in a mental society where since we spend so much time in our head, it's almost like there's a disconnect between our mind and our body. 

Rich Bennett 38:48
Yes. 

Ceirra Hargan 38:48
And it felt like her mind was completely disconnected from the rest of her body. So I had her just send a love to her body, be grateful for everything that her body was protecting her from, being grateful for the disconnect that she had because it was a protection that she had placed from childhood. And in that moment she started crying her eyes out and she's like, Sierra, I can feel the bottom of my feet for the first time in six months. 

Rich Bennett 39:21
Wow. 

Ceirra Hargan 39:23
Like she started wiggling her toes and she's like, I can feel everything. Let me just sit here and feel this blanket on my feet. It was so. 

Rich Bennett 39:34
Why? 

Ceirra Hargan 39:34
All. 

Rich Bennett 39:36
How's she doing now? 

Ceirra Hargan 39:37
She has actually started her own business as a chef. 

Rich Bennett 39:42
What 

Ceirra Hargan 39:43
Yeah. 

Rich Bennett 39:44
are 

Ceirra Hargan 39:44
I'm 

Rich Bennett 39:44
you. 

Ceirra Hargan 39:45
so proud of her. She's incredible. 

Rich Bennett 39:48
Oh, that is awesome. As a chef. 

Ceirra Hargan 39:54
It was her passion. I think it's I think she does Arabic Ayurvedic cooking for people. 

Rich Bennett 40:02
What in the world is that? 

Ceirra Hargan 40:05
It's a specific kind of diet that works on like kind of depending on where your body is, that there's specific foods that are better for you. 

Rich Bennett 40:17
Really? 

Ceirra Hargan 40:17
So she does like a whole body analysis. And then she created an entire business around like sending people meal plans and things like that. And she finally had the energy to create this entire business. After we had the session, and then she called meditating and doing the work. 

Rich Bennett 40:37
Oh, you got to put me in touch with her. 

Seriously, that is. I mean, number one, her story is just simply amazing. You know, from from what you did and now the fact that she's no longer hiding in her home, she started you cannot ask for a better testimonial than that. That and the other thing, what I love. For those of you listening, 

people don't have to come to you. You can do this virtually as well, right? 

Ceirra Hargan 41:11
Yes, so I do. I used to have a I used to do sessions in person in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, but I founded that. It was the exact same thing online. And a lot of people actually prefer online. So now all of my sessions are over Zoom. So I do all my coaching. I do all my quantum healing sessions over Zoom. 

Rich Bennett 41:34
Well, think about it with that young lady you just talked about because she didn't want to leave the house. You wouldn't have been able to do it with her in. 

Ceirra Hargan 41:42
Yeah, exactly. 

Rich Bennett 41:43
Virtually. So something very important tell everybody how they can get in touch with you, because you're also working with people in recovery, right? 

Ceirra Hargan 41:53
Yeah, absolutely. Especially if people are on methadone and they just need to ask questions. I think what helped me the most was like, just start meditating. Like, just start somewhere. Like, even if you're an active addiction, train the body. You don't let your body control you any longer. Even if it's just like meditation for a couple minutes a day. So if you just need a place to start, you can always reach out to me and email me. My website is awake and heart beat dot com. My YouTube channel is at Brooklyn Quantum Healing. And then I also do live coaching and I do group hypnosis with another practitioner. That's incredible. On Patreon, it's called the Quantum Awakening Portal. 

Rich Bennett 42:44
We make group hypnosis? 

Ceirra Hargan 42:46
Yes. 

Rich Bennett 42:48
Really? 

Ceirra Hargan 42:49
Group Hypnosis is actually amazing because. 

Rich Bennett 42:53
Oh, but that's got to be in person. 

Ceirra Hargan 42:55
No, no. 

Rich Bennett 42:56
What point? 

Ceirra Hargan 42:58
I'll invite you to the next one. 

Rich Bennett 43:02
Oh, okay. Wait a minute now. So you. 

Ceirra Hargan 43:07
I have something for everybody. 

Rich Bennett 43:09
I was. This is. This is one of the things I love about the Internet, that you can do stuff virtually and help people throughout the world. And there are some people I need to put you in contact with because what you're doing is amazing just to hear that that lady's story, which I 

we're kind of sharing era. 

Ceirra Hargan 43:35
Vedic. 

Rich Bennett 43:36
Yeah. That 

it's just a your story alone. Everything that you've done. I love the fact that both you and your husband. Husband story. You and your boyfriend. 

It's going to be. Yeah, we're in addiction together and now in recovery together. And here you are. You're helping other people. You want to become a peer recovery specialist as well. I mean, you're just you're an amazing person and thank God you had that spiritual awakening. And I think who whatever it was, it told you to do something. You are doing it and you're making a difference. You are truly making a difference. And I have a funny feeling your journey is just beginning You. 

Ceirra Hargan 44:24
Thank you so much. 

Rich Bennett 44:25
Oh, you are going to be. I think you're going to be extremely busy, but you're going to it's going to be the type of busy where you love it. You love being busy. You know, you're because you're helping people. And when you could do that, it makes a big difference. A big difference. Before I get to my last question, and you're going to have to come on again because. I'll tell you about that when we're finished. Is there anything you would like to add? 

Ceirra Hargan 44:56
No, I just I think this was a beautiful conversation today. If anybody is struggling with addiction, just know that you are stronger. So when people do ask me, like, what is the soul? What is God like? I was never even shown. I never believed in God. Like I never even felt what God could be. I actually never liked AA because I had to give I define that higher power. And I was like, How do I even find it? 

Rich Bennett 45:27
Right? Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 45:30
So when people ask me like, what is God, I would say it's that like they kept me alive during that addiction. It's that thing that was burning inside of me to keep going. Even though I was sad that I woke up the next day or I was in these really dark places. And so if you're still alive in these kind of addictions, and if you're here listening to this, even though you had friends in jail and overdosing and just know that that lies within you, that you are so strong and that you can do this. And so, of course, you could always reach out to me and just ask where to start. 

Rich Bennett 46:08
He's got a plan for everybody. 

Ceirra Hargan 46:10
Absolutely. 

Rich Bennett 46:12
He is amazing. So out of all the shows you've been on, is there anything a host has never asked you that you wish they would have asked you? And if so, what would be the question and what would be your answer? 

Ceirra Hargan 46:28
My gosh, that's a really good question. 

Rich Bennett 46:31
No, that's not the question that's allowed. 

Ceirra Hargan 46:37
You know what? I actually so one thing that I think that I would love to bring up more that 

people because we always talk about addiction but I think just like the actual state that Colorado is in right now. 

So fentanyl has gone really bad in Colorado. 

Rich Bennett 46:59
Mm hmm. 

Ceirra Hargan 46:59
And there are complete homeless camps just full of fat and all. And I do feel like I had to fully change my environment because fennel has gone so bad. And I'm not saying the fennel is not in New York. I'm sure it's in New York. Of course, I like I'm not looking for it anymore. 

Rich Bennett 47:20
Right. 

Ceirra Hargan 47:21
But even when I was in methadone clinics, like the counselors and like being in that environment, they were just saying, like, we don't really see it here. And so to see these stays where fennel is wreaking havoc, where even like teenagers are dying because they think that they're doing a different kind of medication, like it looks like Adderall and it looks like OxyContin. And so the people are taking it and not realizing it's fat and all. And then you never know how much is in it. I think just raising the awareness of that, that it's like truly a pandemic, it's truly wreaking havoc. And it's just a different type of addiction. Like, please just always have compassion for the people that are in these kinds of addictions, because the most likely they've lost touch with that actually actual like human part of them, where they're just in such a state of survival, where they don't know how to make different choices. And so I just want to bring awareness to that. Like, you can even Google like fat in all camps. Denver, Colorado. It's hard for me to even go back there just to see what is going on. And just to see the way that it's spreading. And there's not anything being done about it. 

Rich Bennett 48:44
Which is a damn shame and some definitely needs to be done about it with. 

Ceirra Hargan 48:50
And it's just getting a lot worse. Like it's spreading 

Rich Bennett 48:53
Yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 48:53
like through Phoenix, through L.A., and more people are dying than ever. 

Rich Bennett 48:59
Like I said, now it's people are doing street fentanyl and now it's a mix of that psilocybin. I'm not sure if you know Israel is in is because I didn't when I first heard about it and what it is it it's I think he said it's a horse tranquilizer, but it can start out as like a purple dot on your arm or somewhere else. And that's not necessarily where the injection point was, but it's causing people to lose limbs. And that's a scary thing. We don't we don't need that. I this is the biggest war and the longest war that the United States has ever been in, and that's the war against drugs. And it just seems like it's been getting worse. It's. Better. 

Ceirra Hargan 49:49
Well, and it's because we think of it as a war. 

Rich Bennett 49:52
Yeah, Well, yeah. 

Ceirra Hargan 49:53
So instead of like actually helping these people and teaching them how to be happy, teaching them how to control their mind. We've just we've never been taught like how to handle our emotions. 

Rich Bennett 50:08
Right. 

Ceirra Hargan 50:09
And so this chaos is happening when all of these people deserve recovery and they deserve rehabilitation. It's happening like with jails and prisons also. 

Rich Bennett 50:21
Mm hmm. And thank God there are people out there helping others. And we're talking about it like. Like we are here. And that makes a big difference. And I've said this before, and it's because of people like you that I've had people listeners reach out to me and thank me because they've heard your message or somebody else's message on on the show. And they were able to help somebody that they lost because of because of that. So again, I'm one and I know somebody is going to contact me because of your message. So I want to thank you for that. And. Get ready. Get ready, because you are going to be extremely busy. Extremely busy. So, Ciara, I want to thank you so much. 

Ceirra Hargan 51:12
Yeah. Thank you so much. This is a great conversation today. 

Rich Bennett 51:15
Thanks.